BIG problem,,

Oh my God, this is gonna be a BIG thing..

that is the first thing comes from my mind after "once again" my girlfriend have found me lie to her.
And it's the 3rd times i've cought lie to her for the same reason.

What makes me feel even worse is because actually, i don't even really need to lie. It's not a serious problem. I can just tell her the truth. And i'm sure she can understand with my condition.
But, i'm not doin' it... i skipped this "explaining to my girl" process and decided to tell her a fake story.

When i lie to her, i'm not feel like i am doing a very bad thing. But now,,after she found out the truth. I feel so much guilty about that. i wish i can turn back the time and fix my mistake..

Because eventough it is not a big lie. But in a man-women relationship, where to trust and openess to each other is a basic, lie is always a BIG problem..

Less than enough,,

So tired but I can't sleep..

I can't remember since when this is happening to me...
maybe for this last couple of month, i can't sleep below late 1 o'clock no matter how tired or sleepy i am.

A lot of things to do yesterday. So, i was sleeping for only 4 hours within a day and yet this night i still can't rest my mind.
Now i began to think that maybe the only reason why i'm sleeping is just because my body doesn't have any more energy to keep me awake. Not because my body is need to be rested.

If that is true, then sleep is no longer a necessity.. It became an obigation.

Nirvana - Pennyroyal Tea
...
I'm so tired I can't sleep
I'm anemic royalty
I'm a liar and a thief
I'm anemic royalty
...